So, I’m at a film audition looking forward to diving into the scenes I have prepared. Sitting in the small area outside the casting directors inner office as ready as I’ll ever be, I overhear her talking on the phone. Most
likely speaking with an agent or manager, she is lending her opinion on some preliminary particulars
of actress Lili Taylor’s Deal Memo.
For those who don’t know, a Deal Memo is a form that lists the pertinent
details of salary, guaranteed conditions, and other essentials of a work
agreement negotiated between a member of the cast or crew and a production company. It’s like the “last step” before the
actor officially signs on to the project.
Anyhow, Ms. Casting Director also makes sure to convey to the lady
or chap on the other end of the phone, how very, very excited the producers
will be to have Ms. Taylor on board.
It is then that my eyes pop open as the “needle being pulled off the turn
table” sound effect goes “vvvvrrriiiip” in my head. For I am here to read for
the very role Ms. Taylor is just about to land.
Ugh, that is such a frustrating position to be in! It’s difficult
enough to walk into a room and make oneself vulnerable to a stranger, now ya gotta add this little tidbit to the mix? The truth is, it's also one of those “get over it” moments.
As in...do not spin out and obsess over why you’re even there in the first
place. I mean really, what good
will that do? I'm not saying it's time to just be all "Doodly-doo, it's fine, whatevs," but seriously, take a breath, shake it off,
and treat the audition as a great opportunity to play the role you’ve been
brought in to read for. It may ultimately end
up belonging someone else, but for the next 10 minutes it only belongs to you.
The legendary acting teacher Stella Adler used to tell her students, “in
your choices lie your talent,” and in acting (as in life), our choices are
always filtered through and informed by our personal history, our unique desires,
and our one of a kind physical and spiritual essence. Sure, there may be 50 other people up for the same part as
you -- but no two people will EVER bring the exact same thing to the
table. Nobody can inhabit the role
as you do, and no interpretation will ever manifest the exact same way as any
other. So for all you actors out
there, hold onto the notion that you’re not competing with anyone other than
your best self. In fact,
this seems like a pretty good concept to absorb no matter the profession or
circumstance.
Note to self: Please remember aforesaid advice the next time you find yourself on the playground surrounded by 25-year-old Mommies in sleeveless tops and yoga pants.
Note to self: Please remember aforesaid advice the next time you find yourself on the playground surrounded by 25-year-old Mommies in sleeveless tops and yoga pants.
